Phrases that should be Banned

The following phrases used in everyday language need to be banned immediately. Users of these phrases are not your friend. The use of these phrases places them in the category of combatant to you and the banned phrase should be pointed out to them at once. 

"First of all...." - This phrase is setting up a list that the speaker wishes to enumerate. He or she feels compelled to list all of your offending actions  to build a case against anything you might have said or done. This phrase is a precursor to justifications of your "guilt" or perceived wrong doing on your part. These lawyerly types are amateurs at best and should be cut off at the first utterance of "First of all..."

"By the way.." - This little group of words is the passive aggressive sidekick to "First of all". This useless grouping of words proves only to irritate someone after you thought they finally stopped speaking. "By the way.." is never good. It is a reminder of one last pain point someone is trying to interject after they sugar coated their perception of reality. Its like a sucker punch or one last jab that the idiot speaker thought he would get in before he leaves. Notice that this phrase is usually spewed forth when someone is physically leaving your presence, it's cowardly at best and should also be cut off at the knees as soon as one hears it.

"Check it out..." - These useless words should never be heard by anyone over the age of 16. There is nothing to 'check' - either in or out. This phrase is a call to action to review the moronic meanderings or petty objects of an imbecile. You are not securing a room at a hotel nor are you buying groceries. Those are the only people checking in or out. Let the fool uttering this phrase know he's complete idiot, he deserves to be made aware of his place in society.

"Lemme guess..." - Do us all a favor and lose the guesswork. Playing guessing games never got anyone anywhere.  Adding to the stupidity of the phrase is the self righteous "guess" made by the speaker. It is always negative and highly subject to the aggressive nature of the comment. Letting these dupes paint pictures in your mind of their "guesses" in their feeble brains should be halted immediately. As soon as you hear "Lemme guess.." tell the uninformed parrot you 're not at a carnival and don't play guessing games. Furthermore, you're not letting him do anything.

"Looky here..." - This phrase is by far the most ignorantly stupid statement anyone can ever spew forth. Not only does it show a word that doesn't exist, it presupposes the non existent word can be used in a two word sentence. Where is "here"? Is "here" the person speaking or the thing he is pointing or referring to? People that use this phrase are the same ones that wear hats while driving and have neck tatts. They are to be avoided at all costs. The best defense to this two word abomination is to pretend you heard nothing at all, wait a couple of minutes then look at them like they have three eyes. Keep staring at them, they are stupid and they know it, it just takes a while for these mental handicaps to register.