Monday is analog, Tuesday through Friday is increasingly digital. There is no escaping this, it simply is and will remain so for the rest of human history. The analog world harkens back to rotary dial phones, video tapes and card catalogs in libraries. It is slow, somewhat painful and irritating. It finds you waiting for a response and most things going wrongly.
People are slower to respond and difficult to deal with on Mondays. No one wants to be there, everything is forced and seems unnatural. Your grand hopes of getting things done early in the week are usually dashed by the inaction of others. It's like that annoying busy signal on a phone or accidentally calling a fax line - typical Monday. By all means do not go to a bank, post office or any government office on a Monday. You will experience hell on earth if you do. The poor souls who occupy these wretched wastelands have not yet awoken into their true hypnotized states yet...At least when under hypnosis they can respond through their programming. A three day weekend with a Monday off is more reassuring than taking a Friday. It's psychological- something about not having to face that god-awful Monday makes our hearts leap for joy!
"First, know thyself", does not even come close to warding off the unseen sharpshooters of the universe on a Monday. They are ever present and they have you in their sights. It is their time to attack and bring you down. It doesn't matter how much 'rest' you got over the weekend..It doesn't matter that you limited your alcohol intake and are not hungover...you'll get whats coming to you, it's Monday. Oh, you think you're 'prepared' and ready to go? Think again. The vortex is swirling and Monday is the time when you are closest to it. It's like being near a black hole when space and time are elongated as you are spaghetti-fied and stretched into oblivion. Why did I just spill my coffee and forget how to drink ?- It's Monday. Why do I hear Billy frigin Joel while on hold? - yep, it's Monday.
The solution to our Monday dementia is simple and within reach. It requires a re-working of the Gregorian calendar which was forced upon us and inaccurate anyway. The answer is to simply eliminate Monday altogether. Take it out, give it its final resting place and destroy the useless and loathsome day once and for all! It makes perfect sense- we have an even number of days off, why should we not have an even number of working days? Two off four on - not two five. The current week is out of balance with our natural harmonious state- it is anathema! No wonder why we are so dysfunctional on a Monday! A seven day week with 5 working days and two days off is unbalanced to our nature!
Eliminating Monday will leave us with an additional 52 days in the year which equates to an additional 8 weeks and 4 days. We then add an additional week to the first eight months of the year and extend December 31st to December 35th - it's the holidays- people will appreciate the extra three days off, accounting a day for New Years.
As the days get shorter after the summer solstice, the months of the year will correspondingly get shorter thereby matching our natural rhythms of the seasons in the year. Everyone will feel better and be more productive when we discard the chaos of the impostor calendar foisted upon us.
The winter months will be easier to tolerate with five weeks in them instead of four. For the working man or woman this means five pay checks per month as opposed to four thereby increasing monthly income. Savings rates and economic productivity would increase as well as overall peace of mind and general happiness. An extra four days off during the holidays will also increase the psychological well being of the general public and help people recover from the over consumption of the season.
The simple elimination of a most foul and useless day can change the world and make it a better place. Restoring the natural order and balance to our living days is necessary in this tumultuous time. We must smash the chains of externally imposed time control in our lives and restore the sanctity of time in the human experience. We must destroy Monday.
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